Have you ever poured your heart out to the fullest extremes.
Spoke about injustices while keeping hold of your dreams. So many ponder about the motivations towards the stress and frustrations. While containing the immense hatred of the predicaments I was and still remain to be faced with.
Dreams not making sense goals to accomplish while being so demanding back against the wall struggling for freedom confronted with highest of the obstacles being fenced in feels like its everlasting. A firewall examples similar to being troublesome.
A moment to breathe be in control of circumstances. Make a means of lost chances. Only thoughts are to make further advances.
Losing my mind to regain focus in all things, matters continues to seem so hopeless. I'm coping, wondering about decisions I made and things I expressed misconceptions of where my actions lead me astray those close to me tell me to pray and meditate but uncertainty still felt in my chest with know desires to elevate.
A conflicted usage of energy competitive spirit to shine showing the nature of madness to bring together lost messages a new from of unification raising the bar being beyond basic.
Mistakes, clout my mind I contemplate of my fate. A journey of corrections. The foundation being realities with no shape.
Can I make more of the forms how I wish to be adorn for something greater than the emotions I felt through the storm.
What is known for what I said too much though in what is irrelevant. Deep confusion sparks while I'm m always consistently being tested. Wondering in the dark, confessions and truths of the brokenheart. For I let time pass,and the matters may seem so mere. But throughout concern,to have power which most fear if it could be display clear.
On where all my passions lead towards. For will
I only be know and remembered for my words or my reactions to what I looked as treachery. Pointing fingers in the struggle of progression broken ties, wondering why "He mad at me"
Longing for a means of complete satisfaction in mind,body and spirit. Growth on levels unimaginable beyond my very visions. Making a means of the soul felt tension.
Who's to say who's right or wrong deciphering my feelings yet I strive to prevail holding the weight yet I carry on.
Why I stare at the night skies cause I know it's more to my purpose that I live and what is presented.
Even though I was heavily supported throughout the hectic years smoking cigs on the porch lifted from the leaf I would torch. I'm high out of mind. I sense conversations saying I'm projecting my imagination overthinking of fears. Family and inner circle concerned about health complications, but I feel brief relief. Taking drags mind moving hoping to be at peace and sleep.
In the essence same time never given the opportunities I felt I deserved to further succeed when I was driven by motivation constantly kick to the curb, leaving me unmotivated torn apart from my beliefs cursed by rejection rebuilding my worth royalties destined to me since birth. Labeled delusional these past years, I have to watch what I say I seen and do more background research before I speak and or reveal goals that have me contemplating. Even then I continue to be gracious for this life I have. When I envision my dynasty building an empire brick by brick a legacy built to last a representation of god's gift.
7:20PM
9/15/22
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